


Stargazing

by cheshirecrime



Category: Doctor Who & Related Fandoms, Doctor Who (2005), UNIT: the New Series (Big Finish Audio)
Genre: Bar & Bat Mitzvah, Gen, I do what I want fuck you, baby osgood, in which I vent my complex feelings about my own bat mitzvah through my comfort character, she's small
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-25
Updated: 2020-08-25
Packaged: 2021-03-06 23:55:36
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,232
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26097484
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cheshirecrime/pseuds/cheshirecrime
Summary: It was a beautiful ceremony. It just wasn’t really for Nella.
Comments: 3
Kudos: 17





	Stargazing

It was a beautiful ceremony. It was in the early autumn, late enough in the year for it to be cool but not quite cold. Family and friends from all over were in attendance, for once forgetting the dangerous work they devoted their lives to. The Bat Mitzvah recited her Torah portion beautifully; not a word missed or chant out of tune. The rabbi said little Nella Osgood’s speech was one of the best she’d ever heard, if not containing a bit too much rambling about space. Her mother even managed to get through her blessing and speech without once comparing Nella to her older sister. She felt the most confident in her appearance she ever had, wearing just a bit of makeup for the first time, her glasses embellished with jewels, and wearing a gorgeous navy blue dress with accents of silver that glittered like stars, complimenting her baby blue tallit and kippah.

It was a beautiful ceremony. It just wasn’t really for Nella. At least, she didn’t feel like it was hers. Her family was happy to see each other again, ignoring that she barely knew any of them. Strange relatives kept hugging her afterwards. She didn’t know if she was supposed to know them. Very few people were there for _her_. There was her best friend and one or two of her nicer classmates. Her Hebrew tutor was in the front row, keeping her calm throughout her Torah portion. While the rabbi led most of the prayers, she sat alone in a chair at the back of the bimah, keeping one hand on the purse containing her inhaler. Once she was officially blessed as a Bat Mitzvah, she expected herself to feel different. She’s a woman now, at least in the Jewish sense. She wasn’t exactly sure what being 13 had to do with anything. She was still just the weird kid the other students were mean to. Being a year older wouldn’t change that. She felt just as sad and alone as always.

The party was also beautiful. It was a bit better for Nella, as it was at least somewhat designed for her. It was outdoors, hosted by the botanical gardens. The idea was that the guests would be able to stargaze from their tables, although the party offered enough light pollution to make that difficult. She invited Orpheus, her best friend, to light the candles with her and her small immediate family of three. Orpheus was more than family on his own. Jana, her sister, made a speech, as she didn’t find the opportunity to be the center of attention at the ceremony earlier.

For most of the party, she sat alone at her designated table, meant for her and her friends, but which only sat her, Orpheus, and the cousins she had who happened to be close to her age. More of her sister’s friends had shown up than she had friends at all. Orpheus was having fun on the dance floor, as Nella thought he should. She couldn’t dance for fear of embarrassment, an asthma attack, or both, but that shouldn’t stop him from having fun. So instead she waited at her table as various relatives and family friends she hadn’t met before came and congratulated her while she merely wished she had brought the book she had been reading at home. The music was too loud and there weren’t any songs she really liked.

Really, Nella wanted to go sit at her mother’s table, where various UNIT officers appeared to be talking about work. Nella wasn’t supposed to know about her mother’s job. She wasn’t supposed to know about the aliens or the Doctor or the way her father died. But Nella was an inquisitive and observant child. More than that, she was fascinated by what she heard. She went out of her way to “overhear” work conversations when she was supposed to be asleep. She knew there was someone called the Doctor here to keep her safe. She knew that the universe was so much bigger than what they teach you in school. She understood chemistry better than your average 13-year-old. (she actually understood chemistry better than some university students, but she didn’t know that yet).

To Nella’s surprise, her mother rose from her seat with the blonde woman sitting next to her and headed over to Nella.

“Petronella, this is Kate Stewart. She’s a friend from work, and she enjoyed your speech very much.”

Kate was everything Nella wanted to be. She was in her late 20s or early 30s, but held herself as if she was older and wiser than everyone there. She was wearing a suit. Nella would have worn a suit if she knew she was allowed to. She definitely looked like the kind of person who fights aliens. Nella was awestruck.

Kate sat down next to Nella. “You’re a very bright young woman, Petronella.” _Young woman_. Nella had noticed people had started calling her that instead of _girl_ , albeit usually when they were cross with her. She guessed that’s what being a woman now means. More people cross with her and more responsibility.

“Not many 13-year-olds I know can talk about astrophysics with that much accuracy. Your mum says you’re very interested in it.”

Nella nodded. Her Torah portion happened to be B’reshit- “in the beginning.” Lucky birthday meant she got part of the Torah she blatantly didn’t believe in: creationism. So instead she spent many meetings with the rabbi talking about how the universe was _really_ created. The rabbi seemed up to the challenge. Her speech was about that- kind of. She wasn’t allowed to get up on the bimah and say, “this is all wrong and I hate it,” but she talked about how humans interpret what we can’t understand. The creation story is kind of right- while it doesn’t get the timeframe right, it shows the universe being created in somewhat the right order. She talked about how humanity might not know anywhere near everything; we might understand very little of it at all. This was all wrapped in pages of talk about how cool the big bang was, and how much of the universe is out there. She wasn’t expecting that to be the part that got the interest of the guests.

“The world could use more scientific minds. Too many people out there are much more interested in controlling than understanding.” Kate glanced at Nella’s mother, as if asking for permission to go further. “Your mother and I’s work could use someone like you. Remind me to give you a job offer in 10 or so years.”

Kate smiled and offered Nella a handshake. Nella had never given a proper handshake before. She eagerly took it. Nella couldn’t say that she was already planning on working for UNIT. She definitely couldn’t tell her mother that.

“Well, I won’t hold up any more of your time,” Kate said, despite being the one adult here Nella really _did_ want to talk to. “I hope to see you again,” Kate smiled and walked back to her table, leaving Nella again surrounded by unfamiliar people who were supposedly there to celebrate her, but didn’t seem to care much about her at all.

The stream of unknown guests congratulating her slowed to a trickle, and she was able to be truly and properly alone. Most guests had returned to their seats for dessert. She had managed to convince her parents to have an ice cream sundae bar, which she ate more from than the meal itself. Orpheus stopped by and talked for a bit, calling her “miss” condescendingly, as she was now a woman and he merely a boy. But not long after he was back to pestering her older cousin, as he needed to be friends with anyone and everyone.

Once virtually everyone had moved on to talking with someone else or dancing, Nella entirely wished she wasn’t there at all. Out of the corner of her eye she noticed a vaguely blonde shape moving out of sight of the rest of the party. For a moment Nella thought it was Kate, but Kate was still at her mother’s table. Nella felt the urge to follow, driven by her curiosity and her reluctance to be at the party. No one was paying attention to her anyway, so she made her way to the dimly lit corner of the gardens the figure had disappeared to.

Nella could see the stars here. Exactly as she had planned to be able to from the party. She never really got to stargaze, although it was perhaps the only Nella’s scientific mind would describe as magical. On an earth that makes you feel so crushingly alone, one that, in most cases, shows nothing but inky blackness in its sky, every once in a while you can look at the sky and feel utterly surrounded by the universe.

The stranger had the same idea. She was laying on the grass, staring up at the stars. She was definitely underdressed for the event, but Nella didn’t mind at all. The stranger was wearing a t-shirt with a horizontal rainbow stripe, short trousers, bright yellow suspenders, and a big grey coat. It went against the few laws of fashion Nella knew, and she loved it.

She cautiously sat next to the stranger and looked up at the stars herself. It was a few moments before the stranger even noticed she was there. The stranger jumped a bit, startled.

“Oh, hello! Sorry to slip out like that. I always leave parties a bit early. Osgood, right?”

Nella considered the name. “Most people call me Nella.”

The stranger frowned. “You don’t seem like a Nella. Do you _like_ being called Nella?”

She considered the question. “I suppose I hadn’t really thought about it. It’s either that or Petronella, which I definitely don’t like.”

The stranger looked back at the stars.

“I get that. I’ve never much liked the names others give me. Found it much better to choose my own.”

Nella waited for the stranger to tell her what that name was, but no answer came. She tried to figure out how to ask the question of why the stranger was here without being rude. It’s not commonplace to gatecrash a nerd’s Bat Mitzvah party, so she had to know Nella’s mother somehow.

“Do you work with my mother?”

The stranger paused for a bit to figure out exactly what was being asked. Clearly neither of them were very good at conversation.

“Kind of. I’m a good friend of Kate Stewart’s. I was in town for work and she suggested I come as her plus one.”

Nella wondered if this meant she worked for UNIT. If she did, she definitely stood out from their crowd. They were all in either black and white suits or military uniforms. The stranger was wearing whatever the exact opposite of that is.

The stranger didn’t ask why Nella wasn’t at her own party. Something told her that the stranger had been in similar situations and knew the answer. Instead they both sat back and looked at the stars in silence. Nella named as many as she could in her head. She wondered which ones had secrets she didn’t learn about at the library. Secrets her mother, Kate Stewart, and this stranger likely knew.

She pointed at a star, albeit at random. “I’m going to go there someday,” She said abruptly. She wanted to see the universe. She didn’t much care where.

The stranger smiled. “Great choice,” she said. Nella got the feeling she genuinely meant it. The stranger looked as if she was recalling fond memories before her smile gradually fell, like the story she was remembering met a worse end than she was expecting.

The stranger leapt to her feet faster than Nella’s eyes could keep up with in the dark. “I have to go. It was a pleasure meeting you, miss Osgood.” She offered her hand to help Nella up. “I have a feeling I’ll see you again. But until then, you should probably get back to your party.”

Nella had almost forgotten the party in her honor they had come from. She glanced back at the lights from the celebration, and when she turned back around the stranger was gone. She heard a faint whooshing sound in the distance, as if a massive wind was opening the world’s squeakiest door and then closing it again.

Orpheus came running around the corner.

“There you are! I thought you had abandoned me!”

In a way she had, but he kept talking before she could start.

“Are you okay? You just kinda disappeared. What are you doing back here?”

Nella told a half truth. “The noise and lights were getting to me. Besides, I can stargaze from here.”

“It is beautiful.”

“Care to stay?”

“Let me grab some snacks first. Be right back.” He ran across the lawn, and came back not 30 seconds later as promised.

They spent the rest of the party together. They weren’t particularly missed, but they didn’t mind. She had made this party into something she could love. She named stars to Orpheus, who made puns and crude jokes about many of them. Petronella Osgood’s Bat Mitzvah was perfect in every way, and Nella finally didn’t feel so alone. No- _Osgood_ didn’t feel so alone.


End file.
